Today’s My Two Cents features News From the Future:
FEBRUARY 23RD, 2050 (WASHINGTON DC)
The lone surviving member of the US Supreme Court, Sonia Sotomayor, has died. Sotomayor passed at way at the age of 95 from pancreatic cancer–which the Medicare For All Treatment Rationing Board decided was too expensive to treat. Sotomayor had been the last remaining Justice for four years following the death of Justice Neil Gorsuch back in 2046.
The Supreme Court never regained its nine members after President Donald Trump’s four nominees appointed before his impeachment and imprisonment in the late 2010’s were denied confirmation by the Senate when all of them were accused by Democrats (the previous name of the Socialist Party) of sexual assault and harassment, with the last infamously disqualified for saying that girls had cooties and giving a classmate a purple nurple in kindergarten.
Following that tumultuous time, the Supreme Court saw its numbers dwindle as the two parties exchanged efforts to destroy all nominees–or never bring them up for a vote. The blockade was nearly broken in 2038, but Senator David Hogg (Socialist, FL) learned just before the confirmation vote that the nominee once owned a gun and may have fired it–a common thing in the country before the repeal of the 2nd Amendment in 2028. Hogg rallied the so-called Millenial Caucus in opposition of the nominee, accusing him of being responsible for school and mall shootings.
Sotomayor had not been asked to rule on a case for nine years, as the Senate had also failed to confirm any Federal or Appeals Court judges since 2018.
El Presidente Alexandra Ocasio Cortez (Socialist, NY) issued a statement (translated from the official national language of Spanish) on Sotomayor’s death: “While Justice Sotomayor should be hailed as a pioneer in the Latinx rise to power in this country–and a great help in the establishment of our Socialist State–her death represents the passing of the final vestiges of a racist institution designed strictly to deny advancement of minorities with imperialistic ideals like ‘constitutionality’, ‘individual rights’ and ‘due process’.
Ocasio Cortez adds that she looks forward to striking Article 3 from the Constitution as “all of my executive orders are inherently fair and require no legal challenge”. Any legal disputes will now be handled by the Permanent Court of International Justice in The Hague, Netherlands.
We reached out to Republicans for comment on Justice Sotomayor’s death and El Presidente’s response, but they all cited the recent repeal of the First Amendment and new laws establishing criticism of the ruling Socialist Party to be treason as reasons not to speak on the record.
